Saturday, March 12, 2016

Sentimental

Without keeping track & When you start counting

It's been 12 years
I broken my arm

It's been 11 years
I fractured my ankle
I first going through family dramas

It's been 9 years
I locked myself in the room
Mentally crumbled with responsibility on my shoulder

It's been 7 years
away from high school

It's been 6 years
Everyone pursuing different path
I first stepped into university's life

It's been 5 years
I ended my first relationship.
I first started body building

It's been 4 years
I had my internship at event company
I had a stageplay for a company

It's been 3 years
I ended my second relationship
I had my first prom night
I first stepped into a club

It's been 2 years
I graduated my bachelor degree
My first time taking english test
Quintus was born

It's been 1 years
since my old man's company going through transition

It's been 5months
I am away from my home

It's been 3months
Jayden was born

If I were to live till 96 years old
This is pretty much first quarter of my life

Thursday, November 21, 2013

順其自然

一份愛會出現裂痕 兩個人都要負責任
有些成長來自承認 我終於掙脫怨與恨
年輕總習慣去爭論 要別人照我的劇本
滿身傷痕 才知道悲哀是互不信任

不在乎的眼神 內心悄悄破損
在午夜的時分 被一個夢給拆穿沒忘記那個人

我試著讓生活變得清淡
對幸福或寂寞順其自然
偶爾小小孤單 偶爾小小浪漫
不怕大喜大悲那麼難負擔 

不想再背負太多期盼
對好奇或關心順其自然
只是那點不安 只是那點辛酸
總會忽然擴散讓心又累又茫然
(期望有人陪伴)

每一次記憶的翻騰 既美好也殘忍
思念讓舊情有餘溫
將我困在早應該要離開的空城



黃小琥 

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Surprise?

Is kinda random
that I was told
how things are progressing
but
I am not surprise with what was told
yet expected

After being approx 1 year with him
and on a random day
you tell your current boyfriend
that you misses your ex boyfriend
yet your telling people you cannot hide it anymore
what were you thinking
and after one year
you saying he doesn't suit you
well this reason seems familiar
have you ever considered his feelings
while you are being selfish
thinking what suits you best and not?
yet from the very beginning
you chosen him over someone else
when people treated you nice
give you all the attention you need
spare his time to see you
what else you are looking for?

Is been more than one year
I don't have to try
not to think about it
there are many things
that kept my brain occupied
true fact
I treated you so mean
and yes I really want to be mean
so you will be able to focus more on your current relationship
despite that
things still happened to progress in such a way
what if I have been finding u regularly?
not everyone able to act as if nothing happened in between
doesn't matter how important you used to be
there's already a barrier
every single time you texted me
seriously I wonder do you bother making up your mind
doesn't matter whether you end it or not
I am definitely not the one comforting you
even you came to me
if that is what you define your disturbance
I am fine with it
I will still just gonna  treat you as friend
nothing extra
if you are still seeing some hope
I might just say it here
there isn't any
how I see things and you ain't the same anymore
things ain't gonna be the same
I will be moving on
doesn't matter there is another girl or not


I felt lucky instead
and definitely
not a substitute

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Reflection

Opening my eyes slowly
looking at the clock
its midnight
waken up by a tiring dream
again
I look at the clock
and saw the small date at the side
just another ordinary day
which is the same day things happened year ago

Stood up
and washed my face
standing in front the mirror
and stared at my own reflection
times flies, indeed.
switched on my comp
breathed calmly
played the music player
and start surfing the Internet

Without realizing
It's been one year
not much I could talk about
not much I can think of
but just appreciate somebody who is there for you 
especially the moment you chosen somebody
and been together for some time.
some thoughts may affects the way you are thinking now
things will not be every way you wanted it to be
contradiction will always play its role
if you are not happy with your situation
remember, nothing is perfect
you may consider doing something to fix it 
if things really can be better
have some self - respect with anything you going to do
giving in everything sounds promising
but it is not a long term guaranty
or even end it
when there isn't any point wasting each others money and time
just for the sake of living together
binding each other
or just to show the world what you did was right
well
is your choice
when decisions is made
live with it, deal with it

I am not there this time.


Is true
there may be joy 
disappointment overrides 

Friday, April 27, 2012

How You Remind Me - nickelback


Never made it as a wise man
I couldn't cut it as a poor man stealing
Tired of living like a blind man
I'm sick of sight without a sense of feeling
And this is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am

It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
for handing you a heart worth breaking
and I've been wrong, i've been down,
been to the bottom of every bottle
these five words in my head
scream "are we having fun yet?"

yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no
yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no

it's not like you didn't know that
I said I love you and I swear I still do
And it must have been so bad
Cause living with me must have damn near killed you

And this is how, you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how, you remind me
Of what I really am

It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
for handing you a heart worth breaking
and I've been wrong, i've been down,
been to the bottom of every bottle
these five words in my head
scream "are we having fun yet?"

yet, yet, yet, no, no
yet, yet, yet, no, no
yet, yet, yet, no, no
yet, yet, yet, no, no

Never made it as a wise man
I couldn't cut it as a poor man stealing
And this is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
Of what i really am
This is how you remind me
Of what i really am

It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
for handing you a heart worth breaking
and I've been wrong, i've been down,
been to the bottom of every bottle
these five words in my head
scream "are we having fun yet?"
yet, yet
are we having fun yet [3x]

Set Fire To The Rain




I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me

My hands, they're strong
But my knees were far too weak,
To stand in your arms
Without falling to your feet

But there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

[Chorus:]
But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!

When I lay with you
I could stay there
Close my eyes
Feel you here forever
You and me together
Nothing is better

'Cause there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew,
All the things you'd say,
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

[Chorus:]
But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!

I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Where it felt something die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!

Sometimes I wake up by the door,
That heart you caught must be waiting for you
Even now when we're already over
I can't help myself from looking for you.

[Chorus:]
I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

I set fire to the rain,
And I threw us into the flames
Where it felt something die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, ohhhh!

Oh noooo
Let it burn, oh
Let it burn
Let it burn

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Maroon 5 - Payphone

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember
The people we used to be
It's even harder to picture
That you're not here next to me
You say it's too late to make it
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed
Still stuck in that time when we called it love
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairytales are full of sh*t
One more stupid love song I'll be sick

You turned your back on tomorrow
Cause you forgot yesterday
I gave you my love to borrow
But just gave it away
You can't expect me to be fine
I don't expect you to care
I know I've said it before
But all of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed
Still stucked in that time when we called it love
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairytales are full of sh*t
One more stupid love song I'll be sick

Now I'm at a payphone...

[Wiz Khalifa]
Man work that sh*t
I'll be out spending all this money while you sitting round
Wondering why it wasn't you who came up from nothing
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunning
And all of my cars start with the push up a button
Telling me the chances I blew up or whatever you call it
Switched the number to my phone
So you never could call it
Don't need my name on my show
You can tell it I'm ballin'
Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could've saw
But sad to say it's over for
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now ask me who they want
So you can go and take that little piece of sh*t with you

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairytales are full of sh*t
One more stupid love song I'll be sick

Now I'm at a payphone...

Friday, March 16, 2012

Coincidence

Couldn't help myself
Stepping on the pedal
Driving 120km/h on a busy road
I know it was dangerous
but as I said
I couldn't help myself

After 8 months
this is how we met again
can't describe how i really feel
but it urge me to step on my pedal
Was fetching my friend who is a girl back to a buffet dinner
after hanging out at One - U with other friends
the moment i drove into that street
she was walking out with her family and bf
I not sure whether she saw me
but I guess she recognize my car
and that is why she stopped twice
and check on my car
awkward much?
kinda
met your ex with a girl sitting beside you
why do i even care what she will thinking
after knowing is me
why do i even get mad when i saw her
why do i even care there will be misunderstanding
the feeling just sucks
and kinda mindfuck

time.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Kelly Clarkson - What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger)

You know the bed feels warmer
Sleeping here alone
You know I dream in colour
And do the things I want

You think you got the best of me
Think you had the last laugh
Bet you think that everything good is gone
Think you left me broken down
Think that I'd come running back
Baby you don't know me, cause you're dead wrong

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone

You heard that I was starting over with someone new
They told you I was moving on, over you

You didn't think that I'd come back
I'd come back swinging
You try to break me, but you see

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone

Thanks to you I got a new thing started
Thanks to you I'm not the broken-hearted
Thanks to you I'm finally thinking about me
You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning
In the end...

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone

[2x]
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Man Bai - Kau IlhamKu



Beribu bintang dilangit 
Kini menghilang 
Meraba aku dalam kelam 
Rembulan mengambang 
Kini makin suram 
Pudar ilhamku tanpa arah 

Sedetik wajahmu muncul 
Dalam diam 
Ada kerdipan ada sinar 
Itukah bintang ataupun rembulan 
Terima kasih kuucapkan 

Izinkan kumencuri bayangan wajahmu 
Izinkan ku mencuri khayalan denganmu 
Maafkanlah oh
Andai lagu ini 
Mengganggu ruangan hidupmu 
Kau senyumlah oh
Sekadar memori 
Kita di arena ini 
Kau ilhamku 
Kau ilhamku